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Since I have lost most of my material, time, and purpose to blog, here's another beautiful music video.

Does It Feel Like A Trial...

One month from today I am going to a concert.

I know, big whoop.

This concert is going to be super special, though. It's in California, at the Hollywood Bowl. And it's The National.

Depending on the day, they are my favorite band in the world. Their music is deep, dark, haunting, soothing, sad, pensive, moody, courageous, romantic, and inspiring. They are always whatever you want them to be.

The following music video is from the song "Exile Villify", which was written for a video game. The video was created by a fan (either of the game or the band, I'm not sure) and won a contest. I know Ocarina of Time was good, but I have never been this touched by a piece of video game music.

"I'll Make Up For It Now..."

So you are singing in your car, or your shower, or while sock sliding in the kitchen....

Your voice is melding perfectly with Elton John's, or Beyonce's, or Evanescence's. Your mind is running wild. The crowd loves you. This is your moment. Time for the high note...

And your voice cracks. Or you mess up the lyrics.

What do you do?

Do you just keep on singing like nobody is listening? (Seems like the logical choice since, in fact, no one is.) Do you restart the song so you can sing it perfectly the next time? Or do you just skip to a completely different song due to your previous failure? Curse? Smack yourself in the face? Sing nonsensical lyrics? Take a sip from your water bottle like you had been planning on that the whole time?

After a late-night drive from Logan to Salt Lake last night, I realize what I do. I apologize.

To nobody.

Finally Carl Lewis and I have something in common.

Why You Can't Force A Blog Post

A have a good amount of ties that I have collected over the years.

Red ties. Blue ties. Purple ties. Pink ties. Orange ties.

I have solid ties. Striped ties. Novelty ties. I still have a few zipper ties from that very long phase of my life.

But enough of the Dr. Seuss stuff.

I don't own a single green tie.

Now, if you are still reading this, you might be thinking, "OK, why are you telling us this?" It's simple. Green is a good color for me. A redhead in green is like insta-Christmas. Win-win for everyone. I have green shirts, green sweaters, a green jacket, and a green hat. I can pull off green.

But I tell myself, at 26 years old, that I have not purchased a green tie?????

So I go to places. Department stores. Tie stores. Walmart.

I look at the green ties and I am never satisfied. The shade of green isn't right. I don't dig the striping. The comp color is weird. You know, important stuff like that. And so the search continues.

One day, perfect green tie, I will find you.

And there will be much rejoicing.

A Little Story About Russell and Me

I already told you about my magnificent night spent at the Other Lives/Rosebuds concert a few days ago.

But I didn't tell you the whole story.

Something weird happened.

During the intermission between the two bands, a man walked into the venue who looked like this...

minus the hat.

Meet Russell, an 82-year old ready to rock it out with a bunch of music aficionados, hipsters, and drunk, dancing skanks.

Weird, you say, Badgers? It was. But we are just getting started.

Walking into the room, Russell singled me out, put his arm around me and remarked, "Here's a cool guy right here!"

Right you are, Russ. I am a cool guy.

Then things got uncomfortable.

Russell decided to tell me all the details of his night (art, dancing, and wine tasting) while he continued to have his arm around me and alternated between rubbing my arm and my flank.

For ten minutes.

Yeah, I didn't feel like there was any romantic/sexual intentions on Russell's behalf. He was pretty sauced and really, really old.

I've never been so happy for a band to start, ever.

Another Other

I need to give a shout-out to Other Lives. Their performance from a week ago is still resonating with me on a pretty deep level. Here is a live performance of my favorite OL song, Paper Cities. Listen. Emote. Ponder. Love. Forgive. Promise. I dunno. Just give it a try! It's good!

Two for Two

Last week I was able to spend two days doing what I do best, go to concerts.

Thursday was the opening night for the 2011 Twilight Concert Series. I must say, it started off with a thud. The opening band, No Age, was so horrendous they will forever be enshrined in my Hall of Fame of Crappy Live Bands. (Hello, A Place to Bury Strangers) Luckily, the headliner Explosions in the Sky saved the day. Their music was perfectly fitting for dusk on a summer evening. After all my friends bailed, I remained at the show alone until they played Your Hand In Mine. Totally worth it. Not the best TwiCon overall, but it certainly had its moment.

The next day I was lucky to attend The Rosebuds and Other Lives at The Urban Lounge. I have been a big fan of Other Lives ever since I saw them at Lollapalooza two years ago. Their self-titled album is one of my go-to albums whenever I need to chill. Seriously, give it a try. Much to my surprise, they didn't play a single song from that album. Every song they played came from the new one, Tamer Animals. Despite my disappointment, the show was great. Their folksy sound filled the venue and reminded me of my experience listening to them for the first time. The Rosebuds (listen to this) were also a delight despite playing to a crowd well below 100. (Other Lives has some family connections that attended the first act and then left) The band highlights a couple who married and wrote their most recent album as they went through a divorce. The best moment of the night came when the band all gathered near the front of the stage to perform an acoustic version of "Nice Fox" (see below) They had what was left of the crowd huddle around the band and lead us in a sing-along. It was perfect. I wish you could have been there.

Can't Do It Justice

It's been nine days.

Nine awesome days since I went to the roller derby.

Since the moment I walked out of the event, I have kept thinking how I need to blog about it. I need to tell people about how my already high expectations were kicked in the shins by an even greater reality. I want to tell you all about the hits. The crashes. The drama and anxiety that went along with watching "my team" fall way behind and then make a stunning comeback for a close win. I want to tell you about how grasping the seemingly difficult rules created a satisfying learning experience. (What?) I want to tell you about the movie I went to see after that made me pee my pants multiple times. (Actually, no, I don't want to tell you about that at all.) I want to tell you about the camaraderie of three good friends having a great night on the town. The death metal band playing next door. Fresh fruit slushies from Sonic. The names! I must tell you about the names!

But I can't do it justice.

Roller derby night was too awesome to be put into words.

I Love These Kind Of Mornings

The Dog Days Are Not Over

So I have come to a startling revelation.

Whenever someone throws a frisbee in my general direction, I take on the characteristics of a dog.

Seriously.

My eyes get really wide.

I stick my tongue out.

I start panting.

I wag my tail and catch the frisbee in my mouth.

OK, so the last two are not true, but the rest are. I might have a problem.

But I like this kind of problem.

Oh Happy Day

Need I "say" more?

Dear Amy,

You are a freak.

I'm not trying to say that to be mean. I want to help. You see, for the longest time I thought that was all you really were. Just another freak. But then I started listening to your music. It's awesome. Someday, I want to go see one of your shows and not see the train wreck the people in Belgrade had to witness. I want to see you use your talent to produce more albums. So, why don't you just trying cleaning things up a bit. One step at a time. You can do it. And when you have given up the heroin, cocaine, meth, pills, horse tranquilizers, and whatever else is streaming through your body, I will be there. Cheering loudly and singing along.

Your optimistic fan,

The Paper Badger

Top Ten Cutest Cartoon Babies Pt. II

If you missed it, here are numbers 10-6.

Drum roll please....

Time for the Top 5 Cutest Cartoon Babies of All-Time!

5. Tommy Pickles - Rugrats
Tommy Pickles is too cool and too cute for pants. He is the courageous leader of the Rugrats leading them on adventures to defeat dust bunnies and reach Ice Cream Mountain. "A baby's gotta do, what a baby's gotta do!"

4. Baby Sinclair - Dinosaurs!
He may be annoying to some, but Baby Sinclair was (a toned down) Stewie Griffin waaay before Stewie was cool. He also has the most memorable catchphrase of the group. (Double sidebar: First, watch any clip of Baby Sinclair and his mom and you are totally listening to Elmo talking to Lucille from Arrested Development. Second, remember Earl Sinclair's boss? Has to be one of the scariest villains of my youth.)

3. Baby Po - Kung Fu Panda 2
The inspiration for making this list makes a very impressive showing at #3. I'm sure most of you haven't seen the movie so I will do my best to explain. Our beloved Kung Fu Panda was abandoned by his parents and deliver to his adoptive duck father in a box of radishes. The duck finds a cute, chubby, hungry panda with eyes that will make your heart melt. Honestly, I wanted to put him at number one, but the next two deserve some major respect.

2. Simba - The Lion King
I will admit that we don't see Simba do much as a baby besides be held, paw, and sneeze. But let me say this, there is no denying the cuteness here. It also helps that he is the headliner of one of the most iconic scenes in Disney history along with the most BA Disney character ever.

1. The Muppet Babies - The Muppets Take Manhattan
I'm kicking myself for putting a collective at number one, but how do you split up the Muppet Babies? To be clear, these babies are from the scene in Muppets Take Manhattan not the cartoon that was inspired by it. (Also quite cute) Even if I had to pick just one (I would probably have to pick Gonzo although Rowlf, Kermit, and Fozzie are not far behind) they would still top this list. They are exponentially cuter than Disney Babies or Baby Looney Tunes. They can sing. And they are the Muppets. You just can't beat the Muppets. At least until baby E.T. is introduced.

Honorable Mentions: Baby Bop, Jack-Jack from the Incredibles, the baby animals from Partly Cloudy, Baby Tarzan, Baby Huey, Baby Herman, Pinky from Ice Age, Baby Hercules and Baby Pegasus

So that is my list! Thanks for indulging me. So, how did I do? Agree? Disagree? Did I miss someone obvious? Let me know!

A Little Something...

...while you (meaning Ben, my last remaining reader) wait for the top 5.

This is my favorite song of the day. And probably tomorrow. It's that good.

Top Ten Cutest Cartoon Babies

This is what this blog has come to.

I can't really explain why I did this. I watched Kung Fu Panda 2. I got this idea and I had to run with it. Here are the rules:

1) Babies must be fictional characters in a cartoon, computer animation, puppet, or anthropomorphic form.

2) No toddlers! Has to portray some baby characteristics.

3) No Baby Jesus. Too easy. He gets his own category.

That's it. Here are the Cutests Cartoon Babies 10-6....

10. Pebbles Flintstone, The Flintstones - She started out much higher, but slowly moved her way down the list. She's cute, sure, but there isn't much great about her besides being the namesake for a truly awesome breakfast cereal.

9. Dumbo, Dumbo - Our most vintage participant. Dumbo gets massive points for his massive ears. Poor Dumbo got made fun of by his elephant friends. He finally gets some love on this list.

8. Tokka and Rahzar, TMNT II: The Secret of the Ooze - You probably just looked at the above picture and said, "Gross, those two monsters are not cute and they are not even babies!" Wrong and wrong you are. Back story, Shredder decides to fight the Ninja Turtles by feeding a wolf and snapping turtle the same ooze that turned the ninja turtles mutant. The following hilarity ensues. So totally cute.

7. Kiddy Kong, Donkey Kong Country 3 - I may have broken Rule #3 here. Kiddy seems like a baby. He has a binky. He cries a lot. But he is huge and had a pretty big adventure. But the baby in Baby's Day Out had a day out, so I'm including Kiddy. For now.

6. Maggie Simpson, The Simpsons - Maggie doesn't do much. She enjoys her binky and occasionally shoots a billionaire. I can say with perfect certainty, that this is the one baby on the list that I want to dress my future child in costume. Light blue onesy and bow. Red binky. That is so happening.

Come back tomorrow for the Top 5!

Guns n' Roses n' Cellos

Vindication

Today is a beautiful day and this picture says it all. I have never been a fan of the Dallas Mavericks. Especially after this...

I have always thought that Dirk Nowitzki was a chump, Mark Cuban was a loudmouth, and Dallas fans were fair-weather, clueless and indifferent. But when the Mavs faced Miami in the NBA Finals, I did not jump on the Heat bandwagon. I didn't even make a list like I had to for the Super Bowl. I cheered for the Mavericks like there was no tomorrow.

I hate the Miami Heat and I hate LeBron James. I hate everything their franchise stands for. I couldn't bear the thought of them highjacking the NBA championship one year after The Decision and the Premature Celebration. They are arrogant. Their fans are worse than the fans in Dallas. They had to be stopped.

Lucky for me, they were stopped. It was a great series and both teams played hard. ( copyright - Rasheed Wallace) The Mavericks didn't only win for themselves, Mark Cuban, and they city and fans of Dallas. (Who, by the way, stepped it up big time) They won it for the Rebellion. They won it for Cleveland. They won it for the hope that a team without three All-Stars can go all the way.

Come on, Jazz, we can do this!

What the 80s???

The song Take Me Home Tonight by Eddie Money does not appear in the movie Take Me Home Tonight. Yeah, I know. I figured I would just cut right to the chase on this one. When Take Me Home Tonight, the movie, came out a few months ago I was curious. A movie starring Topher Grace and Dan Fogler did little to excite me. But the title of the movie got the gears in my mind turning. The Eddie Money song is one of my favorite 80s songs and I quickly imagined an inspiring montage set to the song at the climax of the movie. Or maybe the song would back the opening credits. Or possibly it would pop up three of four times. No matter what that song could sell even the worst of movies. That song is clutch.

Fast forward to this afternoon. After missed attempts to catch the movie in the theaters, I finally got around to seeing it. The song didn't start the movie. The song never played from the car during a driving scene. The song didn't accompany a romantic kiss. No song during a montage. It didn't even pop up during the closing credits. IT WASN'T IN THE MOVIE AT ALL!!!! Are you kidding me???? That is like E.T. without E.T. Muppets Christmas Carol without the Muppets. To be completely honest, the movie sucked. (Not a surprise) Not funny. Not clever. Not cool. If anyone knows of a movie with that song in it, let me know. Until then I will fill that void with this YouTube clip.

A Pleasant Surprise

Do not adjust your computer screen, these are real words appearing on my blog. You won't believe this but I'm actually going to write more than one sentence too. So it is no secret that my move to Salt Lake has been somewhat of an inconvenient disaster. I've been through two jobs and am moving on to a third shortly. My car has been through one minor accident and a smashed sunroof. The weather has been awful. I'm not trying to complain just to illustrate that greener pastures sometimes take a while to grow. I still have high hopes that I will be able to find my niche in this city and make this move worth the struggle. Luckily, one of my Salt Lake goals (being closer to sweet concerts) has not disappointed one bit. The Lady Gaga show was completely worth the ten month wait. Pinback was a lot fun despite the dumb, dumb, dumb crowd of idiots. Menomena was fab and Arcade Fire blew the roof off of my mind-house. But, I have rarely been so impressed with a band as I was last night with The Head and the Heart. I had listened to a few songs from their self-titled debut album and figured they would be a good excuse to get myself out of the house. So I grabbed my friend Chris and away we went. Kilby Court was packed with several devotees and curious onlookers like myself. The band played with a contagious energy that lasted throughout the show. Since band is still somewhat new, you could see their love for their music and performing it had not dimmed in the least. I've got to give them credit. Best $12 I've spent in a while.

Hello John Stamos

This video is kinda odd and has quite the sad ending, but this song has me in a trance.