What Should I Do?: Part One

With the Super Bowl less than one week away, I find myself faced with an important yet difficult dilemma.

Who do I cheer for?

As a die-hard fan of the San Francisco 49ers, I don't have a dog in this fight. As a matter of fact, the last time my team played for the Lombardi trophy I was nine years old (Not that I can complain that much, they have won in five times in their history). Each year when the Super Bowl comes around, I don't have much difficulty selecting which team I will root for. I tend to side with the underdogs or sentimental favorites ('08 Giants, '10 Saints). I also will quickly root against the teams I hate or "dynasty" teams (Cowboys, Packers, Steelers, Patriots). That is what makes this Super Bowl so tough. I really don't want to see either team win. So, it order to sort out my predicament into the First Ever Paper Badge Tale of the Tape: Super Bowl XLV Edition.

1. The Lemon Law

In order to proceed to the rest of our head-to-head comparison, both teams must pass the Lemon Law (© Barney Stinson). This means I have to be able to look at both teams and not find one thing so overbearingly repugnant that no other factor will even matter. The Lemon Law test requires asking three questions. First, Did anyone involved with either team do anything to physically or emotionally hurt your family, friends, or Rihanna? Second, does Brett Favre or Max Hall play major minutes for either team? Third, if given the choice to watch Best in Show or The Guardian, would anyone on the team pick that horrendous Costner/Kutcher disaster? Okay, so that last one may have been more for dating, but as far as I am aware both team pass the first two questions.

Advantage: Push. One point for both team

2. The Facial Hair Factor

There has been much fanfare this week surrounding the locks of Troy Polamalu and Clay Matthews. I'll give these guys credit for some great hair, but if you want to win my Super Bowl vote, it's all about the beard. And the winner of the Super Bowl beard competition is not even close...

Meet Brett Keisel, Steelers defensive end and alumnus of BYU. For those non-sports fans out there, if you were shown this picture and were given x-amount of choices to guess the university he attended for a million dollars, how many guesses would it take to finally say BYU? I'm not entirely sure what the Packers have to offer in the beard department, but it can't touch this.

Advantage: Pittsburgh. Double points for a double beard.

3. Hate/Revenge Level

My hate for the Packers runs deep. My buddy Marcus has always despised the Pack and passed that on to me. During the 90s/early 00s, the Niners and Packers had a series of great rivalry games, most of them did not go our way. But, this team is different. There is no Brett Favre. No Mike Holmgren. The Pack whooped us this year, and I have beat us eight straight times. The last time we beat them was on a miracle pass from Steve Young to Terrll Owens. All that said, I don't mind seeing them lose.

I've never really hated the Steelers. The Niners rarely play them and we beat them in '03 followed by a loss in '07. The one thing that the Steelers have going against them is the amount of Super Bowls the have won. They currently have six, while the Niners (and Cowboys) have five. A 7-5 advantage is tough to overcome. We were first to five and it would be nice to get that title back.

Advantage: Pittsburgh. I was originally going to give this section to Green Bay, but as I typed their section my blood started to boil with the memory of all those defeats. One point to the Steelers.

Through three quarters, the Steelers have a 4-1 lead. Tune in tomorrow for Round 2.

49ers game

Well, This Doesn't Happen Every Week

Niners win. Even better, they beat the defending NFC champs in their own stadium. I hope the good vibes carry over into next week. I could get used to this again.

Leprechaun Dance

School started on Monday and it is as painful as I remember it being last year. There are a few upsides I suppose; seeing some of my technical writing buddies, chilling out on the Quad, etc. But, for the most part attending class makes me want to light myself on fire and run through endless shards of bee-covered glass. Luckily my cereal box of doom is not without a salvatory toy at the bottom. I have a few things I am giddy as a goat about. In no particular order, here they are:

• Football season!- OK, this one may be an a particular order. Next Thursday, the real football season kicks off as the University of Utah hosts Utah State. I will be in attendance and if you do not know who I am cheering for then you do not know me as well as you think you do (Here is a hint: Not Utah State). As much as I love the other sports of the world, football is different. I don't know what it is, but it is different and I can't wait to spend every Saturday and Sunday (and Monday, some Thursdays, and the occasional Friday) watching it.
• Football season! Pt. 2- As part of the kickoff festivities, my buddy Marcus and I will be traveling to San Francisco to attend the 49er's home opener against the Seattle Seahawks. We really splurged to get decent seats (Ninth row baby!) which basically means that Mr. Cody will not be able to afford vacations like this for a long, long time. (PS- If somehow under God's will I have a computer by that time, there will be blog! Oh yes, there will be blog.)
• Fantasy football!- Haha. This is not a joke. But yeah, I will stop with the football stuff now. (Go C.Titty Brigade!)
• How I Met Your Mother season 5 premiere (Sept. 21 on CBS)- It's going to be....
• Supernatural season 5 premiere (Sept. 10 on the CW)- If you are familiar with this show you might have heard it is infamous for the crazed female fans of it's two hunky male leads. This is not why I watch the show, I swear. When my friends explained the show to me they said it was about "two hot young brothers who drive around the country in an Impala hunting demons". I laughed, then I sat down and watched and episode, and then another, and you get the story. I was hooked. Let me count the ways that this show is awesome. (1) Great storyline. (2) Always funny and clever. (3) Features tons of classic rock. (4) One time, I was watching it at night and I got so freaked out I had to turn on every light in the house. (5) Tons of action. (6) Impromptu lip-syncing. (7) Did I mention they are killing demons? So that is seven reasons I love the show right there and I promise it's not because I think the guys are hot.
• The Sounds & Foxy Shazaam on Oct. 30.
• Passion Pit on Oct. 7.
• Dirty Projectors on Nov. 7.
• The Australian Pink Floyd Show on Sept. 16.
• My sister gets home from her mission on October 20th or something like that!
• Picking flowers in Sardine Canyon on breezy fall mornings.
• Listening to the Best of The Beach Boys the first day it snows in Logan (I will not even joke around and make a prediction on when that will be).
• Lighting myself on fire and running through shards of bee-covered glass the first time I go to school and realize I forgot to write a paper.

So that is what I am excited about in my near future? Are you excited for me to blog about it? Oh, by the way, the title is what all of this stuff makes me want to do.